On Navigating Creative Pursuits as Women of Color
I grew up in the late 90s/mostly early 2000s after the introduction and phenomena of music videos. I have vivid memories of putting on my school uniform while watching MTV in the guest room with the volume turned waaaaay low. I loved how music videos told a story, whether it was literal to the lyrics or an abstract concept. I especially loved the dancing!
According to my mom, I was singing before I could speak. She was a member of the choir and back in the day you had to bring a blank tape and a tape recorder to rehearsal to learn your part on your own time. She would play the tapes in the car and my toddler ears picked up the melody and would begin singing along. I was put in dance at the age of 3, quit by the time I was 8, but always loved to do it.
One thing about me (that I am currently working through, baby steps…)—I’m very shy when it comes to my talents. I majored in Musical Theatre in college and many people would not guess that in an initial conversation with me. Yet throughout my childhood, I would spend hours performing in our basement for the audience in my head and continued to sing and dance for years in my youth.
It was in middle school that I found theater, it melded both singing and dancing and added another layer of acting, but at the end of the day it was all performance. I performed mostly in theatres around the community until I was accepted to the magnet high school for Drama. My favorite role to this day is the Dragon in Shrek the Musical. One thing you must know about me is—I love Shrek. The movie. The franchise. The musical. All of it. I got to step on stage, be a diva, have a show stopping number and chill out backstage until the second act.
I knew I wanted to go to college for theatre and it just felt right given I was in high school also training for it. I got into several schools and ended up attending one school and finishing at another.
College is when it all shifted.
racism in the arts
They tell you the “industry” is hard, that casting heads and producers and directors will “tear you down”, that you’ll constantly be choosing this career over family and other obligations, that if there’s something else you’d rather be doing then you should be doing that.
What they don’t tell you about though, is the treatment. Especially when you don’t fit the homogenous type. You’re essentially an “other.” I came to theatre because it was an extension of playing pretend, I got to live out my music video dreams in a way and finally I felt like I found a community that I related to and where I felt safe.
As a Black Woman navigating a theatre program, the safety that I originally came looking for was nowhere to be found. I left school feeling defeated, less than, beaten down, a ‘fraud’ and above all else, isolated. I felt like the experiences I had were my fault, that I deserved to get yelled at by my male professors. That I was the only one combating microaggressions and just outright racism at the hands of educators. Since I was repeatedly being berated and belittled by faculty, then the problem had to have been me. Right? I was the only Black Woman in my graduating class of my program, so there was really no one to share the experience with. I spent more time blaming myself and making myself believe it was something that I had done and could change.
community for creative women of color
I wanted to create the WOC Creatives group to make a community and space where I felt I had none. Often we feel like we are the only ones experiencing what is happening to us. When we are able to give a voice to that experience, that’s when we find out that we aren’t alone.
We deserve to feel empowered, seen and heard in rooms and situations where we are absolutely the minority voice.
During this current time, we should especially be the ones leading conversations and offering our opinions. By virtue of being a creative, one can feel isolated and by adding the many intersections of identity, that feeling of isolation is enhanced. Finding community that looks like you and can also relate to you is so essential, beautiful and rare. We will support each other, hold space for one another and hold each other accountable as we learn tools of self advocacy, getting out of a creative block and empowerment.
The group is slated to occur Wednesday’s 6-7:30 and run until the week before Christmas. I hope in sharing my story perhaps you saw bits of yourself and maybe now you feel a little less alone. People need people, creatives need community and we were not made to do this all alone.
Please come join us!
Jada Castillo is a an empath who is learning to embrace my beautifully rich, deep feelings. She is also a creator and performer passionate about helping you celebrate your diversity, authentic self-expression, as well as your vulnerabilities and insecurities. A a Black women and a creative, she is especially dedicated to helping women of color unlearn the narratives and ideas that society and systemic racism has of you—ones that have worked to minimize your power and move you away from your talents and richness—and build resources and connections that support women of color to thrive in creative fields and to feel confident.
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