jesse romo, amft

l.a. bipoc therapist specializing in trauma, relationships, & addiction

hello,

i believe people deserve love, connection, and empowerment regardless of their identities, their histories, or the obstacles they have faced.

I help people go from feeling disconnected, disempowered, or inadequate to feeling more self-compassion, connectedness, and purpose in their lives.

About jesse (he/him)

I offer a warm and accepting therapeutic space where you can explore the intersections of your identities and the unique challenges that have brought you to therapy. I am a multi-racial therapist who understands the complexity of identity, recognizing the importance of intersectionality and sociocultural forces in our lives, and centering these considerations in therapy. I know through my lived experience that identity is complex and multifaceted, and that many of us occupy spaces in between—what Gloria Anzaldúa calls the borderlands of identity.

I am committed to exploring and addressing the effects of oppressive social structures and ideologies through therapy, creating compassionate and empowering space for BIPOC folks who have been impacted by systemic racism, microaggressions, and intergenerational historical trauma. I recognize the deeply rooted harm of systemic oppression and the experience of un-belonging. For many, this experience entails a rejection of self, stemming from internalized racism, heterosexism, cisgenderism, and other oppressive ideologies. I know how hard it can be to connect with people and communities that embrace all of you, especially when there are so many essential and diverse (and some deeply wounded) parts of you. 

My purpose as a therapist is to work alongside you in your processes of healing, empowerment, and self-actualization. I support folks who are feeling lost or confused about their values, beliefs, or direction in life, as well as those who struggle with deep-seated feelings of inadequacy or defectiveness. I know how painful this can feel. I’m dedicated to walking alongside you as you explore the many parts of yourself, especially those that you have had to hide and lock away. Together, we will work to create a relational environment in which expansive self-compassion and courageous authenticity will grow. Our work will center around supporting you to connect with all the parts of yourself, to know your worth, and for this to be abundantly reflected in your life and relationships.

As someone who firmly believes in the radically healing potential of human connection, I am dedicated to working with relationships of all kinds. I value working with relational systems like families, couples, expansive partnerships, and non-romantic relationships in which one or all members have significant challenges related to unstable or unsafe upbringings and/or experienced traumatic abandonment in childhood (frequently called “complex relational trauma.”) I help families, couples, and other relational systems who are struggling with conflict, disconnection, and miscommunication to increase intimacy, security, affection, and trust in their relationships.

I possess extensive training and experience working with children, adolescents, and families and love to offer education and tools to support healthy child and adolescent development. I’m especially passionate about supporting people who are parents or plan to be parents who seek to better understand and heal from their own childhood wounds and relational patterns. Together, we can connect with your inner child to heal old wounds and begin to practice more mindful and conscious parenting. Even if you have no children and never plan on having them, conversations on child development and explorations of your own childhood can serve as transformative healing experiences.

Let’s work together to help you embrace your humanness, to ameliorate aloneness and alienation, and to begin to flourish in your most authentic self. Let’s help you build more nourishing, intimate connections in your life.

support for substance use & overcoming addictive patterns

As trauma and substance use specialist, Gabor Maté, says, “Much of what passes for normal in our society is neither healthy nor natural, and to meet modern society’s criteria for normality is, in many ways, to conform to requirements that are profoundly abnormal in regard to our nature-given needs.” What is often labeled pathology or mental illness in our society is actually a normal or understandable response to profoundly unnatural and harmful social conditions. The patterns of cognition, emotion, and behavior we develop are largely symptomatic of discord that is far more nuanced than a medical diagnosis. When someone is depressed, anxious, or addicted to substances, we have to ask what came before–what created the conditions for this distress to take root?

My belief, supported with abundant trauma research, is that much of our psychological distress stems from isolation, disconnection, and sociocultural forces like systemic oppression and relational conflict/stress. Isolation, trauma, relational wounds, and un-belonging demand creative ways to cope and survive, like turning to substance use and other addictive processes as ways of coping. At first, they help, but over time, these strategies lose their effectiveness. What started as an understandable effort to seek safety and comfort can often transform into instability, harm to yourself and others, and being cut off from living the life you want.

I have lived experience with trauma and addiction, and I recognize the profound impact these forces can have on individuals and relationships. Whether you have struggled with addiction, are exploring your relationship with substances, or are finding it difficult to change harmful addictive patterns, I offer a tender approach that focuses on reducing harm, uncovering the roots of addictive processes, and collaboratively generating sustainable change that helps you live with a greater degree of freedom, authenticity, and connection.

I’m also passionate about supporting adolescents and young adults struggling with addictive processes (substances, screen time, other addictive behaviors) to embrace who you truly are with more effective tools to support you in moments of big feelings, overwhelm, and insecurity.

Together, we will learn to navigate life's challenges, cultivate healthier relationships, and be your most authentic self. I’m dedicated to building a relationship where you feel connected with me as your therapist and my hope is that this supports you to deepen your connections with others out in the world. I look forward to working with you!

Career Highlights & Key Trainings

i am…

I am a multi-racial (Chicano, Asian American, Irish), cis-gender, hetero man who supports a feminist, antiracist, and anti-oppressive approach to therapy. I am someone who is working to break intergenerational cycles of addiction, abuse, and trauma while revising narratives around distress and wellbeing. I am in long-term recovery from drug and alcohol addiction. I am a spiritual seeker and existential thinker who recognizes the highly subjective and phenomenological nature of examining life's bigger questions, while also believing these sorts of questions are often significant sources of distress. I am a non-pathologizing therapist who seeks to normalize suffering as a natural response to a toxic social ecology, systemic oppression, and complex trauma, rather than viewing it only as a discrete, symptomatic disorder.

In my spare time, you can find me developing a new recipe in the kitchen, making music, working on or riding my motorcycle, playing a new video game, or spending quality time with my partner and our three cats (Sakura, Amma-chi, and Simba) at home.

california registered associate marriage & family therapist no. 145733, supervised by dani marrufo, lmft no. 129955 and paul kindman, lmft no. 96984

We would love to connect with you.

The easiest way to get started at Kindman & Co. is to book a twenty minute complimentary information session with our Care Coordinator, Clarissa. On this call, she will ask a little about you and what’s bringing you to therapy at this time, share about our practice and our relational therapy approach to make sure it’s a good fit, and pair you with the therapist who is best suited for you.

**Please note that we are only able to work with clients physically located in the state of California at this time.