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On the Privilege of Being a Second-Gen Immigrant

I don’t know how others were taught, but as the child of immigrant Asian parents, there was in fact, a secure, “successful” path to life that was instilled in us: do well in school, go to college, and obtain a job that will grant financial stability—which usually means doctor, engineer, accountant, anything that can give you sustainable money! After which, you can explore other creative and nontraditional paths. As rigid as this path may be, it also makes a LOT of sense. I can’t speak for all immigrant families, but obviously life is f*cking hard! Many immigrants didn’t travel here with much, and financial sustainability is essential for survival. The path that they teach is one they think will allow for an easier, less stressful life. Which is still true, AND I also share with many of my second-generation, child-of-immigrant-parent peers, the want to love what we do and also navigate privilege that our parents didn’t and still don’t have. 

privilege and being second-gen

Let’s talk about privilege! Gaby wrote a great blog about intersectionality and assessing your privilege, so feel free to pop on over there to assess. Then, come back here to reflect. I can wait! If/when you’re good to go, here are some of my reflections, do you relate?  

As a second-generation immigrant, I have a lot of privilege compared to my parents and grandparents. Socioeconomic status. Citizenship. Formal education at a university. English as one of my first(ish) languages. All given to me by the blood, sweat, and tears that my parents have had to put in in search for a better life for their children—me! With that privilege comes the ability to explore what my passion could be, what my future career could be (outside of what is expected of me), and what I really like to do. With that privilege also comes actually being able to think about what is really sustainable both financially and emotionally. With that privilege and allll that I can do comes guilt and confusion! Again, my parents never navigated this! Where do I turn to? What do I do? And ALSO they still are not able to do what they really like. Do I have permission to do so? What can I do?

using privilege

If you’re still with me and relating or have just really reflected on the power in privilege that you may have, keep reading. With privilege, there is so much that you can do! Yes, please explore what you like to do (which I will discuss later) and also use your privilege. One quote by Marie Beech, social justice advocate, has stuck with me: “Privilege isn’t the presence of perks and benefits. It’s the absence of obstacles and barriers. If you have a hard time recognizing your privileges, focus on what you don’t have to go through. Let that fuel your empathy and action.” Some folx within the community have been focused on gathering wealth individually, and rightfully so, considering the intergenerational trauma and lack of wealth. I think in addition to that, especially for those with more privilege, is intentionally thinking about how we’re contributing to community wealth and community healing. 

The U.S. has ingrained in many of us the importance of individualism…which turns into “What can I do? What am I contributing? How can I make a difference?” These are all good questions, and there is individual work and unlearning to be done. AND there is the need for community and community work. The groundwork is there to advocate and fight for our communities, for our parents, for our grandparents. Especially for younger generations, many activists have already researched and been in years and years of organizing. So maybe the questions to ask, especially with our privilege and capacity, is “What can I do for my community, with my community?” 

finding your own path as a second-gen

Alright, so how does this all relate to finding what you like to do? Here it is. Acknowledge that our privilege allows us to explore more than what our parents have, and go ahead and explore! Our privilege doesn’t need to be a deterrent for us to do what we like! We also may not need to follow the path they suggest, as we’re exploring that we have more freedom to choose. As we hold that idea, there’s an equal need to hold the commitment to community advocacy and social justice values. (I’m really emphasizing this to those with privilege, whether in socioeconomic status, gender, race, etc.)

Ending this off with some affirmations to my intersectional community of children of immigrants and people of color! It’s still hard for both you and your parental figures to survive in this very violent, oppressive society. You’re doing the best you f*cking can, and you deserve rest. Go cut some fruit for yourself and your loved ones. And take a nap if you can.


Amanda Lam is an empath, aspiring therapist, and the Care Coordinator at Kindman & Co. They really enjoy connecting with others and building community. They are especially interested in working with/supporting QTPOC folx. For fun, Amanda loves to explore different coffee shops, dance, and be creative—whether through art, design, or photography.


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